Monday, December 31, 2012
I got this from hbigalaxy.com and I thought it was interesting. However, some people thought it is simplistic, and that "one size does not fit all." Do we all have different reactions? I think that traumatized people and sensitive people have reactions to yelling, negativity, put-downs and the like. Lynne The Most Dangerous Word in the WorldPosted by Ray / December 30, 2012 / 1 Comment This word can damage both the speaker’s and listener’s brain! If I were to put you into an fMRI scanner—a huge donut-shaped magnet that can take a video of the neural changes happening in your brain—and flash the word “NO” for less than one second, you’d see a sudden release of dozens of stress-producing hormones and neurotransmitters. These chemicals immediately interrupt the normal functioning of your brain, impairing logic, reason, language processing, and communication. In fact, just seeing a list of negative words for a few seconds will make a highly anxious or depressed person feel worse, and the more you ruminate on them, the more you can actually damage key structures that regulate your memory, feelings, and emotions. You’ll disrupt your sleep, your appetite, and your ability to experience long-term happiness and satisfaction. If you vocalize your negativity, or even slightly frown when you say “no,” more stress chemicals will be released, not only in your brain, but in the listener’s brain as well. The listener will experience increased anxiety and irritability, thus undermining cooperation and trust. In fact, just hanging around negative people will make you more prejudiced toward others! Any form of negative rumination—for example, worrying about your financial future or health—will stimulate the release of destructive neurochemicals. And the same holds true for children: the more negative thoughts they have, the more likely they are to experience emotional turmoil. But if you teach them to think positively, you can turn their lives around. Negative thinking is also self perpetuating, and the more you engage in negative dialogue—at home or at work—the more difficult it becomes to stop. But negative words, spoken with anger, do even more damage. They send alarm messages through the brain, interfering with the decision making centers in the frontal lobe, and this increases a person’s propensity to act irrationally. Fear-provoking words—like poverty, illness, and death—also stimulate the brain in negative ways. And even if these fearful thoughts are not real, other parts of your brain (like the thalamus and amygdala) react to negative fantasies as though they were actual threats occurring in the outside world. Curiously, we seem to be hardwired to worry—perhaps an artifact of old memories carried over from ancestral times when there were countless threats to our survival. In order to interrupt this natural propensity to worry, several steps can be taken. First, ask yourself this question: “Is the situation really a threat to my personal survival?” Usually it isn’t, and the faster you can interrupt the amygdala’s reaction to an imagined threat, the quicker you can take action to solve the problem. You’ll also reduce the possibility of burning a permanent negative memory into our brain. After you have identified the negative thought (which often operates just below the level of everyday consciousness), your can reframe it by choosing to focus on positive words and images. The result: anxiety and depression decreases and the number of unconscious negative thoughts decline. The Power of Yes When doctors and therapists teach patients to turn negative thoughts and worries into positive affirmations, the communication process improves and the patient regains self-control and confidence. But there’s a problem: the brain barely responds to our positive words and thoughts. They’re not a threat to our survival, so the brain doesn’t need to respond as rapidly as it does to negative thoughts and words.  To overcome this neural bias for negativity, we must repetitiously and consciously generate as many positive thoughts as we can. Barbara Fredrickson, one of the founders of Positive Psychology, discovered that if we need to generate at least three positive thoughts and feelings for each expression of negativity. If you express fewer than three, personal and business relationships are likely to fail. This finding correlates with Marcial Losada’s research with corporate teams, and John Gottman’s research with marital couples. Fredrickson, Losada, and Gottman realized that if you want your business and your personal relationships to really flourish, you’ll need to generate at least five positive messages for each negative utterance you make (for example, “I’m disappointed” or “That’s not what I had hoped for” count as expressions of negativity, as does a facial frown or nod of the head). It doesn’t even matter if your positive thoughts are irrational; they’ll still enhance your sense of happiness, wellbeing, and life satisfaction. In fact, positive thinking can help anyone to build a better and more optimistic attitude toward life. Positive words and thoughts propel the motivational centers of the brain into action and they help us build resilience when we are faced with life’s problems. According to Sonja Lyubomirsky, one of the world’s leading researchers on happiness, if you want to develop lifelong satisfaction, you should regularly engage in positive thinking about yourself, share your happiest events with others, and savor every positive experience in your life. Our advice: choose your words wisely and speak them slowly. This will allow you to interrupt the brain’s propensity to be negative, and as recent research has shown, the mere repetition of positive words like love, peace, and compassion will turn on specific genes that lower your physical and emotional stress . You’ll feel better, you’ll live longer, and you’ll build deeper and more trusting relationships with others—at home and at work. As Fredrickson and Losada point out, when you generate a minimum of five positive thoughts to each negative one, you’ll experience “an optimal range of human functioning.” That is the power of YES. 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Steve called a week and a half ago, to tell me when to delete anonymous comments. (Sigh). It was on the 19 on Thursday, no, it was not it was on the 17, actually, when Gary Murphy checkd our crawl space and I was listening to the internet broadcasts for the so-called Bounce back. I bought the Iphone, but I went back to Apple, and I don't find that their customer service at the Mac Store or Straighttalk, which is a division of Tracphone wireless is optimal. It still does not work without wifi, although Siri works. The internet still cannot work very well. I can provide web accessibility consultancy which I will provide in January, write articles, and coach. I am producing webinars. Whether it is web accessibility, entrepreneurship for nontraditional workers, or interdependence and independence, I am the "gal" for you. Cheerleader for life is what I call myself. I will be writing more. I will check out more options for earning money. Thanks, Steve, for telling me about the comments. I have to work on that. More to come. Lynne
Saturday, December 15, 2012
I have been doing some research on the Iphone. I checked AT&T and GCI and ACS.ACS had better rates for a two-year contract. $70 or something $105 or something. $50 fr a phone. Money for insurance. GCI had a better rate for insurance, but more money for roaming, and everything was more expensive. I forget what the phone is. I did not want to pay more and both were 16gigs. My cousin from Israel, who is in the States in Missouri for taking classes mentioned straighttalk.com. I don't remember what At&t said, but here are the things I wrote for the other two. Diana says that a new phone with a two-year contract is $50 (I was looking into a 4S. $115 a month. $9.99 amonth insuarnace, (lost or stolen or water damage). Unlimited text talk, nationwide no roaming. 16gigabyte storage. 5gigabytes a month internet usage. GCI 16gigabytes $150 Insurance $6.49 dataplans 3gigs $19.99 5gigs $29.99 10gigs $59.99 20 gigabytes $99.99 internet unlimited text and picture is another $15 a month. When you get 5gigs, your phone becomes a personal hotspot. You have to add nationwide for some larger amount. Straight Talk 16 gigabytes $59.94 and activate on the website, One gets unlimited text, talk and data with this $45.00 a month. We'll see. These things are so complicated. I will see about getting a refurbished phone. Hmm. I have researched this for a month. Koraling Lynne
I am taking the second part of the webinar course. This is where we actually do the work on preparing webinars. I have one on "interdependence and Independence" which is about help, and Stephen Covey mentions interdependence as higher than independence. I have to find those quotes. I have found that disability organizations and those able-bodies people are the garget audience I want to present to. Of course, there are other projects that I have interest in, but Koraling Genius Consultants is taking shape. I feel so hopeful.