Friday, July 1, 2011


It's July 1. What is the matter with people when they complain to authoriaties instead of to us as human beings? We have become so litigious and think laws or policies will solve things. No, not so much, but communication between human beings is the ticket. I never wnated to work with clinical social work, because when I hear about people's struggles and pain, it reminds me of my own, or the emotional abuse I have witnessed and been a survivor of. I just can't take any more stress, and people have such low frustration tolerance, and they lash out, instead of reflecting, breathing and meditating. I don't be responsible for anyone else's pain or suffering any more. I care too much about people. I want to rescue them and help them. Sometimes, I give up or put up the "white flag" because trying to really get my points across with a dog guide school, when they tend to be paternalistic or condescending and teach us "learned helplessness." I want a dog guide again, but don't know if I can handle any more crap from anyone. After the abuse with certain teachers and social workers trying to make decisions for me, what can I do? I feel bad when Sandy is attacked, and I do all I can to minimize things for people I love, even if I get frustrated about people's behavior. I just must model good behavior. I am an extrovert and passionate, and I am intelligent enough to know certain things, but not everything. I can tell people why websites are accessible and how it will help improve their bottom line and their relationships, etc. So, what can I do now? I don't have much motivation, and that is because I am so afraid that someone I contact will be angry with me, and criticize me. That is why I meditate, and do what I can. The people at the VA Health Systems organization are really impressed with me. Who knows? Something may pan out from that. I'll just have to see what happens. Koraling Lynne